What Has Self-Talk Got to Do With Weight Loss?
by Annette Jones
What DOES self-talk have to do with weight loss?
Everything! Self talk can affect your confidence, self esteem and have a real impact on how you feel and what you think about yourself.
Some of the most common problems I hear from women that really want to lose weight is that they have a lack of time, lack of will power or lack of self-control, and can I tell you, it’s NOT your fault!
One thing I want you to understand is that you are not alone and EVERY person on the planet has this very same problem about something that is going on in their lives, unless your control your own mind, IT will control you!
And that’s OK for all the mechanics of our bodies that we don’t want to think about and have control over, such as a regular heart beat, imagine every second of every day for your entire life having to tell your very own heart to beat, you would have no time for anything else!
There are several areas that we can be aware of about how and what we think and explore, however, the first area we can take a look at is what are the conversations going on in your head and are they uplifting words about you or not?
What IS your own self talk, what do you say to yourself? Are you aware of them or you haven’t got a clue of what I am talking about?
I’m not talking about “Positive thinking” either…
Introducing Negative Nancy’s Self-Talk
Here’s what I mean.
For example, you think to yourself “I’d really like to buy that dress, I really like it” and without you even realizing why, you can be walking OUT of the store without the dress you REALLY liked and wanted!
So what just happened my friend is the conversation in your head that controlled whether you bought the dress or not. Your own self talk and it generally goes something like this.
“I’d really like that new dress, I love the color” “What, that one? You wouldn’t look good in that” Or “What, that color wouldn’t suit you” or “Nah that would look way better on someone else than you”.
In that short time, right in that moment that sometimes constant companion, Negative Nancy, talked you out of buying that dress in an instant!
Nancy probably controls way more than you even realize. She probably tells you stuff like
- you can’t do that
- you are not good enough
- what makes you think you can do that?
- someone else is way better at that than you
- you wouldn’t fit in there
- what are you looking at those new trainers for, you know you’ll never use them
- have that piece of chocolate cake, you can always start again tomorrow
- etc, etc
I bet you could even add a few of your own in there yourself!
So how do you change that?
First let me remind you again that it’s NOT your fault and it’s all the life experiences that you have had in the past that brings you to this exact spot!
People, situations and the stories we tell ourselves, really shape the person we become, especially in those first 7 years of our lives.
It could have been a friend, a childhood sweetheart, a well meaning family member, a teacher or your peers. It could have been something you saw on the T.V., heard on the radio or read in a magazine that lead you to believe whatever Nancy is constantly chattering to you about, day in, day out.
The exposure varies but the impact can be the same, something that was said to you along time ago can still be impacting your life, right now, to this very day!
Imagine a 6 year olds point of view, running your life today, not the actual 6 year old but the way the 6 year old thought at the time. That my friend could be happening to you, I know this for a fact because I’ve found it out about myself!
Just last weekend I bumped into an old friend I hadn’t see for a few years. She had lost alot of weight back then and was dealing with a crisis and a lot of issues in her life and we lost touch because of where she was in her life.
I commented how good she looked and how much healthier she looked too. Her immediate reply was that she’d put ON weight (which she has) I said she looked better for it, “yeah” she said “but I have to tell myself that and see myself in that light” she has her own self-talk going on as we all do.
What to Do About Your Own Self-Talk
So what is there to do about our own self-talk?
We are always thinking, hearing or doing something to improve our bodies and in the process we have forgotten all about our minds, the very thing that runs the show. Which is totally OK because you might not have even known about it until this very moment!
We have lots of positive opinions about others but not a lot of positive opinions about ourselves. True?
I want you to really think about this and become aware of the self-talk that is going on in your head. Is negative Nancy chatting away day in, day out?
Is she bossing you around telling you what to do & how to do it? AND do you also realize in this process you DON’T agree with her?
This is the first step in taking your control back over your own mind and your own self talk. Awareness is the all important key to unlocking the door to whatever you want to achieve in life, not just weight loss.
Will you EVER have full total control? Probably not, however, just becoming AWARE that Negative Nancy exists let’s you know that you can at least take control of the conversation!
Remember this is NOT about “Positive Thinking” or being egotistical about yourself, it’s just watching, observing, listening and being aware of what is going on with your self talk.
In the next few days write down in your journal or notebook a few of the words or sentences that you catch yourself saying as you go about your day and here is the next installment about self-talk and its relationship to weight loss and what to do next.